Saturday, April 24, 2010

Bobrobert's Obituary

This will run on Friday in Dallas, Shreveport, Baton Rouge, San Francisco, and Austin.

Robert Ray McKellar passed away on Friday, April 23rd, 2010 at Christopher House in Austin, Texas from complications due to multiple sclerosis. He was 49 years old. A memorial service will be held at the Gilliam United Methodist Church, in Gilliam LA on Saturday, May 1st, 2010 at 2 PM. Officiating will be Reverend Emile Rousseau. A celebration of his life will follow at the home of Beth and Mickey McDade in Belcher LA.

Born on December 27th, 1960 in Shreveport, Louisiana to Diana Meares McKellar and Benny Ray McKellar, Bobrobert was raised in an extended family so full of love, it's frightening. An artist and educator by trade, he was also looked to as a trusted friend and counselor by those who were blessed to know him.

On October 10th, 1992, Steven Landherr joined Bobrobert in climbing a waterfall in the Appalachian Mountains, where they exchanged vows of eternal love and commitment between themselves and God. Their love for one another was ridiculously strong, weathering the unfathomable stresses and pain of MS as it quickly stole many of his abilities and eventually his life. During their time together, they lived in Dallas TX, Baton Rouge LA, San Francisco CA, and Austin TX.

Bobrobert is preceded in death by his father Benny McKellar, his maternal grandparents Doris Pearce and John J. Meares, and his paternal grandparents Leveda and Lyman McKellar. He is survived by his husband Steven Landherr of Austin TX, his mother Diana McKellar of Belcher LA, his brother John McKellar and wife Debra of Keller TX, his nephew Jay McKellar of Little Elm TX, his niece Chandler McKellar of Keller TX, his aunt and uncle Beth and Mickey McDade of Belcher LA, his cousins William McDade and wife Kelly of Belcher LA, Paige McDade and husband Frank Hendrick of Belcher LA, and Eric McDade and wife Hillary of Shreveport LA.

Memorials may be made to Equality Texas at, or The McDade House, 1825 Warrington Place, Shreveport, LA 71101.


Herrad said...

Hi Steve,
Thanks for posting this, especially because today must be such a difficult day for you.
Hope you have love and support around you.
Thinking about you and BobRobert all the time.
Big hugs.

Nancy said...

Beautiful obituary. Well said.

Anonymous said...

Great tribute, Steve. There is no one like Bob, and I was lucky to know him and have his influnece in my life. I thank God he is finally at peace. Randall

zoomdoggies said...

Thank you for letting us out here in blogger-land know Bobrobert through your posts and photos. He had a grin big enough for two people. He's at peace now, and it doesn't hurt anymore.

Liam said...


Beautifully written. The life of love which you and Bobrobert shared is truly inspirational. You are in my thoughts during this very sad time.


Lisa Emrich said...

Beautiful tribute! Love the family-love reference and mention of your Appalachian vows. Very special obituary indeed.

Hope you are getting just the right amount of quiet time and copious amounts of love and support.


Anonymous said...

What a wonderful tribute to Bob and to the life and love you shared. That's a great picture of Bob, and just the way I will always remember him. Even though God didn't grant him longevity, the world was just a little bit happier and a lot more fun because he was in it. I feel blessed to have been able to call him my friend. I know how much you must be hurting, and I hope that God is able to heal your pain. You are in my prayers.

Kim said...

Thanks for posting this.

Patrick@Caregivingly Yours said...

"Their love for one another was ridiculously strong" You two were and will always be one of a kind!

Caregivingly Yours, Patrick

Cranky said...

Steve - great obit! I bet that will be one dynamite party after the service.

I've been thinking about you so much today in your first day in a new role I'm sure you never wanted ... Surviving spouse. Hope there's plenty of warm love and support around you.

azoyizes said...

Hi Steve,
You don't know me, but I'm friends with Herrad who told me about BobRobert. I am so very sorry.

kmilyun said...

Hiya Steve,
Thank you for taking the time to share all that you have. Especially now when I know your hurting. What an awesome obit/tribute - it speaks volumes of the love you shared.

God-bless you and yours,

imascatterbrain said...

I hope the strong love the two of you still share
will give you strength and comfort as you need them.

Lorraine Kennedy

Stephany said...

Beautiful tribute, Steve. Alas, BR and I share a birthday.

The Girl from the Ghetto said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your difficult and tragic news.

Celeste Maia said...

Dear Steve,

Herrad wrote about Bobrobert's death and gave your blog address. I know it must be extremely hard to say goodbye to such a wonderful person. I want to join all your friends in sending my love and support.
Celeste from Spain

Miss Elaine said...

Beautiful tribute. Cj and I wish we would have had the chance to know him better, this past year went so fast. Bobrobert will be sorely missed. I hope the we, the cal rodgers loader, can help you through this difficult time.

Elaine, Cj, Josephine & yoda

pb said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you today.


Anonymous said...

Hello Steve:

Thanks for coming by my blog to leave your thoughts.

My prayers are with you as you go through this planning stage for funeral and know that the week after will be the time you really need all of us to talk to/read with, if you feel up to it.

Although BobRobert is gone, I hope you will continue to use the blog page to update us about you and your feelings --- for you to vent, ruminate, and remember BobRobert as you go through all the stages of grief.

Take your time, there is no timetable, but please reconnect with us as you feel up to it.

Great tribute to your loving partner. You have a lot of us behind you in spirit.

Love, Anne
Disabled Not Dead

dpagemck said...

He was the glue that held so many of us together. I loved him terribly and will so miss his infectious laugh. Though I was never quite able to qualify for the martini club....I look forward to hoisting a few in his honor, along with Paige. You, Steve, have been so incredible and I am as proud to call you my brother as I was my Bob. Rest, my friend. I will see you soon.

Have Myelin? said...

Thinking of you on this difficult day. We don't know each other at all but I was born in Ruston, LA and know the area you guys hail from.

I know from experience there is not much I can say to make you feel better but I am glad you two got to spend some time together. Hang on to that.

Richie said...

Well said. Thanks for posting it. He touched peoples lives.
Lots of love to you.

Gareth said...

Hello Steve, just wanted to pass on my deepest sympathy for your great loss of your partener Bob. Lots of strength and Hugs to you and all Bobs friends and family.
Kind regards Gareth
(a friend of Herrad)

The Wheelchair Kamikaze said...


What a wonderful tribute to a wonderful guy. I'm so sorry for your loss, but BR will live forever in your heart.

My deepest sympathies to all who loved him.


bean & trish anderson said...

Dear Steve,
How does one capture a lifetime in the few words of an obituary? It's probably not possible, but you beautifully expressed the deep love between the two of you.
Our deepest sympathy goes out to you with the passing of BobRobert.
Bean & Trish Anderson

gina said...

your strength is incredible, i'm so very proud of you for holding all of enormous group of friends you both had together..together...I will see you soon

Josue said...

All my condolences.You know that i was one of those who knew how supportive you were for him.I also remember telling you that i had never experienced such a true love.I really meant it.


Anonymous said...

Bob was the center of my life for 7 years, an amazing, gifted, beautiful, brilliant, joy filled soul. I loved him totally and completely. Thank you for posting all you have, it has allowed me to follow his path through his life with you and this horrendous illness. I am so sorry. I also am so grateful that he found the partner in life he was seeking, he was able to be married to you and that he was able to live his life with you Steve to the fullest. He was so fortunate to have found you and we are all so very grateful that he had you to care for him during this most difficult and tragic path with MS. I too thank God that he is no longer in pain. I know he waits and watches over us from above. There is a direct line of communication to him now.

Lisa Ledet Ferrell

Anonymous said...

oh steve,
you are so amazing and loving and strong.
anything i can ever do for you would be my wish is your command.
i remember the first time i met bobrobert, and i told him he was clooney's doppleganger. remember meat loaf is just that...meat!
he is in my heart now and always as you are. love to you
xo ms. gail

Denver Refashionista said...

My deepest condolences and prayers.

Dana B. said...

Seeing the pictures of Bob made me smile. He was always so full of happiness and laughter. Even when he was sick he could still find humor in his life. He was a blessing to all of us that knew him. Thank you Steve for keeping up this blog and for being there for Bob, he loved you so much.

GaryG said...

Hi Steve,
You and Bobrobert popped into my mind last Saturday...I didn't realize I was being sent a message that our friend was saying goodbye.
Thanks for posting such a beautiful obituary. You and Bobrobert shared a life full of love. Fausta and I feel very fortunate to have shared in that joy with the two of you.
You are in our thoughts and prayers. We are very thankful for how Bobrobert touched our lives with his wonderful humor and loving personality. He is indeed resting more peacefully now.
Whenever you make a return visit, you will always have a place to stay with us.
Take care, Steve.
Gary and Fausta

Diane J Standiford said...

The perfect obit. May peace be with you and his love dwell forever in your heart.

annajanine said...

this is a beautiful passage, steve. bob was an amazing soul and i'm so thankful that the two of you were brought together for the time that you were. my heart goes out to you in your time of grief. love you both :).

Anonymous said...

Hey Steve...thinking about you as I read all the writings you have done. Love seeing the pictures too. What a life you and Bob had while we were all sitting here in Belcher. Hope you are as ok as you can be for now!
Sister from Belcher