Wednesday, March 4, 2009

His laughter is my drug of choice.

I'll admit it. I'm addicted to his full-body laugh. Not that patronizing one I get when I say something incredibly witty that he didn't really hear but he saw the expectant look on my face and threw me a bone. No, I'm talking about the laugh that only comes when I get it, and he gets it, and we know how stupid it is, so we do it again. And we still get it. And we laugh until we can't breathe and tears are running down our faces.

These days, that kind of laughter has been in short supply. Since the failed intrathecal pump trial, his pain is a guest that insists on hearing every word I say, then analyzes what a poor joke I'm making. In the end, my jokes have the opposite of the desired effect.

And all this while he is taking enough opioids to kill most men. Jack Osbourne would be paying me to tell jokes half as funny.

So like most good addicts whose supply has dried up, I've found alternatives. I'm blogging more and hanging on every comment. I'm being hypercritical of the American Idol contestants. Hell, I'm being hypercritical of everything, including myself.

And then tonight I got a fix. I put BR to bed and set him up on his side to ward off bedsores. He wanted some water before I changed the pain patches, so I grabbed the mug and made some stupid comment. And he started laughing. And he didn't stop. And I laughed. And we laughed. And we stopped. And we laughed again just as hard. Oh God, it's better than sex!

When we lived in California, the laughter came a lot easier. So much has changed since then, not the least of which is the loss of medicinal marijuana. You can take your Marinol and shove it, Texas. It is not a replacement for good, old fashioned, American grown, God created, pain relieving, appetite increasing, mood elevating pot! By criminalizing such an effective drug with centuries of recorded safe usage, you are condemning BR to be a guinea pig for the pharmaceutical and implant industry.

I invite every politician that has ever opposed the medicinal use of marijuana to come and care for BR for a month. In fact, I insist!


Richie said...

I think I started clowning for Herrad the moment we met. Often I have not known when to stop- when some one invites you to go to bed with them for the first time I advise against a oneliner -however good: it will still be talked about twenty years later!
I guess I was addicted to her laugh from the first meeting.
Weed: We have the help of a legal supply- we can buy it through our pharmacist but I can get organic grown from my local coffee shop a bit cheaper. I am allowed to grow five plants for home use which I will do when my horticultural advisor returns from vacation.
Herrad needs a bit of help in keeping her sense of humour fresh. As it is we have to watch how funny we go 'cos laughing can cause nasty spasms.
I am pro recreational use but the argument for medical use is the relief it gives. It helps Herrad stay enjoying her life. I will go fill her a vaporiser now and sneak a pipe full my self. Thinking about you two suffering more than you have to is having a negative impact on my sanguine humour.
Love Richie


I'm so glad you guys had a good belly laugh. Simply wonderful.

And as far as states goes, Texas will likely remain one of the least progressive.

Herrad said...

Hello Steve,

Recognize the laughter/pain thing did notice when I stopped smoking joints a year ago that for a wee while my sense of humour had gone, very upsetting and odd not to spend lots of time laughing with Richie.

After I got used to the vaporizer my laughter came freely again, cept now have to watch for the spasms triggered by laughing..

Glad that I could laugh again as really love being able to hang out or lime as they say in Trinidad with my darling Richie.

Really there in spirit with you both and hope you can get to love and laugh together as much as possible.

In the short time that I have been reading your blog and getting comments from you I feel more and more fond of you both.

You are now two dear friends to me.
Take care sweethearts.

Kim said...

You are so justified in being pissed at politicians. What they call the debate over medicinal pot is *not* a debate; it's political posturing based on fear and ignorance.

On a more pleasant note, the beautiful thing about your writing is I could hear both of your laughs so clearly in my mind it made me start laughing. It's contagious.

I hope we'll be able to share a few good laughs when I'm down in Texas; if nothing else the number of hugs and kisses I have to deliver to y'all from Chicago friends is enough to give us all giggle fits since I promised to deliver each one individually :-)

steve said...

Richie - Laughter causing pain ... I guess if laughter is the best medicine, Herrad can easily overdose.

Lisa - You're right. Texas politicians work overtime to maintain that tough cowboy image of the state. Got pain? Have a shot of whiskey and bit the bullet. My allegiances are with the Indians, er, Native Americans when it comes to pain management.

Herrad - I feel the same way about you and Richie. I've learn a lot from reading your writings. We are becoming like a ball of fire ants floating in a flood of storm water, each taking turns going under.

Kimmie G. - Your visit will do us so much good! I need to listen to Depeche Mode and watch The Young Ones. Now that I've been tutored by Richie, I should be able to understand even more of the dialog.

Kim said...

Oooh, a Young Ones marathon sounds fabulous!

Once I learn a bit more Dutch (or at least enough to feel brave enough to write in it), I may start telling Herrad about you in your younger and more foolish college days, so be warned ;-)

kmilyun said...

Laughter - yes! I enjoy reading your blog. Inspiration.

California does have some good things going on LOL.

Lisa I think is right Texas is not known to be progressive - but then again they have you two now to brighten and enlighten.


Herrad said...

Hi Steve, Hi BoRobert,

Came by to say hello hope you both are ok.

Take care.
Sending you good thoughts from Amsterdam.